Being Gay in Men's Football: A Toxic Environment

“You shouldn't exist” ... “What are you doing here?” ... “Stop breathing.”

After announcing his homosexuality in 2021, footballer the athlete has received daily death threats and abusive messages on social media.

“Upon reading those comments, I was devastated,” Cavallo states. “Nobody should have to endure such words.

“I'm working to improve my skills and reach my full potential during matches, and then face criticism due to my identity. It's appalling.”

Player Cavallo was playing for Adelaide United back in 2020 when he became the only openly gay elite soccer player in the world.

This summer he departed from Australia to join lower-tier club Peterborough Sports, who compete before audiences of about 400 in National League North, the sixth tier of the English soccer system.

The 25-year-old combines playing for the semi-professional team by speaking up on inclusion matters and using his profile - he has more than one million followers on social media - to promote fairness and acceptance.

“Absolutely, we've got mountains to do,” Cavallo says when questioned about ongoing issues with discrimination.

“I don't go more than a week without encountering problems.”

‘People want to harm me’

It took years for the athlete to work up the courage to say “I am homosexual” before coming out on October 27th, 2021.

“My only desire is compete in soccer and be treated equally,” he stated in an accompanying video.

Cavallo was twenty-one and making a name for himself at his Australian club in Australia's top flight when, with the support of his team-mates, he publicly came out.

“The future was uncertain. I had no expectations,” he recalls. “The moment seemed appropriate in my life. I needed to move forward.”

His emotional coming out video, entitled ‘His Personal Story’, went viral on social media.

“My phone was flooded with encouraging words. It was overwhelming.”

A prominent club were among numerous famous teams around the world to show solidarity with the player, with the coach at the time the German manager saying: “I appreciate that he did it because now we talk again.”

Barcelona defender the athlete also expressed backing, writing on social media that “soccer culture is far behind and you are helping us move forward”, while his former club released a comment backing their “extraordinary” and “brave” player.

Some people, however, were not so accepting.

The footballer soon turned into a target of homophobic abuse by rival supporters.

In January 2022 Melbourne Victory were penalized five thousand dollars over anti-gay abuse from spectators aimed toward the player during a match.

“The comments I encountered were painful and derogatory towards my community,” he explains.

“I didn't react because responding would encourage detractors.”

There was a frightening incident at a petrol station in Australia, where Cavallo was assaulted by someone who recognised him from the coverage.

“It was terrifying,” he remembers. “I remember thinking ‘this is real - individuals intend to hurt me’.

“Is it acceptable? Absolutely not. But by coming out, these are the consequences.

“My wish is that future individuals who reveals their orientation while competing in soccer at a high level doesn't have to experience the journey I have experienced.”

The player says the daily death threats and hostile communications have taken a toll on his psychological well-being.

“It's quite sad because I am having to explain why I deserve a place on the football field for my identity,” he states.

“We don't sit straight people down and ask ‘why should you exist in football?’.

“Many individuals see me as a smiling, optimistic person. But there are days when I lean on my fiance, Leighton, and he witnesses much of what occurs behind the scenes.”

‘Premier League player coming out would move mountains’

Cavallo's decision to disclose his orientation helped inspire 17-year-old attacking player Jake Daniels to announce he was gay as the Britain's sole publicly out playing soccer professional in May 2022.

However, there are no openly gay or bisexual players in the top English division.

“It would create massive change,” says the footballer on the effect a Premier League player coming out would have.

“But I'm not going to sugar-coat it. There are a lot of scary things that would await this individual. Within soccer culture, being an openly gay player is a highly hostile environment.”

Over two decades after a pioneering player - the UK's initial out soccer professional - died by suicide in 1998, the current athlete has discussed the “harmful male culture” that still exists in professional soccer.

“You just need to go to a match and see the hostile environment and male-dominated culture that the crowd brings,” he explains.

“Much remains to be done to ensure there is a safe space in football for people like myself and his colleague.

“Progress has been limited (more players coming out) as frequently as desired.

“My role is to continue advocating for principles I believe in, and work towards eliminating the harmful male norms in football changing rooms and establishing secure environments.”

‘I'm here to create change’

Cavallo says football has enabled discussions within team environments about coming out.

However, he is critical of soccer's global governing body, after the Middle Eastern nation, where same-sex relationships are illegal, staged the global tournament in 2022.

The 2034 tournament is scheduled in another Gulf state, where same-sex attraction is also illegal.

“Do I approve that the World Cup is in nations that ban gay unions, where people like me will be imprisoned for merely living on their territory? It's frightening,” states the athlete.

“I receive communications [from people living in these countries] saying ‘I'm about to be put in prison for my identity - is assistance possible?’.

“It's devastating that individuals are incarcerated for their true selves.

“Certain nations that are huge in terms of football and they reject LGBTQ+ people. These places that often focus on me.”

Nevertheless, the footballer says he won't cease advocating.

“Soccer has allowed me to start conversations in the locker room. It has allowed me to speak and inform individuals who seek understanding.

“Some will disapprove for who you are. But I have found my family. I have found my community.

“My mission is to create change. That's my objective.”